Deep Black Silence

People who are empty inside, what can they offer the world??

Silence.

 

EACH MAN KILLS THE THING HE LOVES

EACH MAN KILLS THE THING HE LOVES .

SOME DO IT WITH A BITTER LOOK,SOME WITH A FLATERY WORD.

THE COWARD DOES IT WITH A KISS .THE BRAVE WITH A SWORD .SOME KILL THE LOVE WHEN THEY ARE YOUNG AND SOME DO IT WHEN THEY ARE OLD .

SOME STRANGLE WITH THE HANDS OF LUST.SOME WITH THE HANDS OF GOLD.THE KINDEST USE THE KNIFE ,BECAUSE THE DEAD SO SOON GROW COLD.

SOME LOVE TOO LITTLE,SOME TOO LONG.SOME SELL AND OTHERS BUY.SOME DO THE DEED WITH MANY TEARS,AND SOME WITHOUT A SIGH : FOR EACH MAN KILLS THE THING HE LOVES.YET EACH MAN DOES NOT DIE …

- RockyF Neeraj

Monday Blues

Morning at 9:30am, I am sleeping tring tring.. “hello!” ok.. hmm.. ya… what!! disconnected. Called my manager.. what the crap Azhar.. why the hell this guy not turned up. “sir he refused on the last moment” Meet me  immediately!

He is not willing to work! call him let me speak. “Hey you!!! beep beep.. where the hell are you man! you were supposed to reach at site at 10am and its already 11. “excuses” disconnected!

“I want a different guy by today. The work should start tomorrow in any case”, “do you understand”.. manager: “yes sir”

Read news paper and tweets of mr.  Bachchan. He was there in NDA for some lecture. Good to know that. Called friends and made plan to some outing… all in vein.

Some meetings with Police and few business meetings.. applied for arm license and help people under table to get it done fast. Will be getting .40 calibre gun soon. Got full report of work .. little progress indicated. Time for Barcode.. few drinks and bakwas..

All this is what a MONDAY for!

I am not a big deal. At All.

Hi :-)

I'm 27.
I'm the guy who is best friends with my car and writes blogs about everything and everyone that happens to me. Names included. ;-)
Class of 2008.
In my spare time, I like to conduct random writing experiments in my red book and write letters to people.
I really love people who like business. They're number 1 on my favorite things list.
I'm not a big deal. At all.
I love people who are nice to me, I've never been one to say things like "All you people think you know me, well you don't".
Because I'm not that complicated. My complications come out in my phone. All you need to do to be my friend is like me.
My middle name is SD.
I love surprises and hardwood floors.
I like people who are excitable. I think it's endearing when people cry when they're happy. I'm pretty excitable too.
I've never been the kind of guy who needs a girlfriend. Plus, girls don't ask me out because they know I'll write blogs about them.
In life and love, you learn that there comes a time to let go and move on. It's a lesson I learned recently.
I wear too many rings and I can't concentrate on the conversation if the TV's on.
I grew up in many places. Seriously.
I'm fascinated by black and white pictures, I have them hung up everywhere.
I like people who can be sarcastic and laugh about tense situations.
I never assume someone's not being honest with me.
I like to read up on weird computer problems, so if one of my friends ever complains of a net break or hard disk crash, I'm probably going to spout off 12 different things that could be wrong with them. Because I'm way paranoid.
I think  Toby Keith and Swift Taylor are the coolest celebrities ever.
I don't like making decisions when I don't have to.

I will never do my hair to impress a girl ever again.
There's never going to be a time when I'm annoyed by compliments about my blog.
I need everything to be organized. All the time.
I think little kids are awesome.
I'm a thinker and an over-analyzer. I'm not jaded.
 
Oh yeah.. My name's RockyF Neeraj.

I am RockyF

I'm all business in my suit,
Yeah, I'm dressed up for success from my head down to my boots,
I don't do it for the money, there's bills that I can't pay,
I don't do it for the glory, I just do it anyway,
Providing for our futures, my responsibility,
Yeah I'm real good under pressure, being all that I can be,
And I can't call in sick on Mondays when the weekend's been too strong,
I just work straight through the holidays,
And sometimes all night long.
You can bet that I stand ready when the wolf growls at the door,
Hey, I'm solid, hey I'm steady, hey I'm true down to the core,
And I will always do my duty, no matter what the price,
I've counted up the cost, I know the sacrifice,
Oh, and I don't want to die for you,
But if dying's asked of me,
I'll bear that cross with an honor,
'Cause freedom don't come free.

I am Neeraj the RockyF.

I love this bar..

View Full Album

We got winners, we got losers
Chain smokers and boozers
And we got yuppies, we got bikers
We got thristy hitchhikers
And the girls next door dress up like movie stars
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar

We got cowboys, we got truckers
Broken-hearted fools and suckers
And we got hustlers, we got fighters
Early birds and all-nighters
And the veterans talk about their battle scars
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar

I love this bar
It's my kind of place
Just walkin' through the front door
Puts a big smile on my face
It ain't too far, come as you are
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar

I've seen short skirts, we got high-techs
Blue-collar boys and rednecks
And we got lovers, lots of lookers
And I've even seen dancing girls and hookers
And we like to drink our beer from a mason jar
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar
Yes I do

I like my truck (I like my truck)
I like my girlfriend (I like my girlfriend)
I like to take her out to dinner
I like a movie now and then
But I love this bar
It's my kind of place
Just trollin' around the dance floor
Puts a big smile on my face
No cover charge, come as you are
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar

We got divorcees and a big bouncer man
An old jukebox and a real bad band
We got waitresses and we got barflies
A dumb-ass and a wise-guy
If you get too drunk just sleep out in your car
Reason number 672 why
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar

Play it on out boys
Beer-thirty's over
Got to take it on home
Hmm, hmm, hmm I love this bar
I just love it

A letter from a friend who is always with you but you simply don’t care!

Hi,
As you got up this morning,
I watched you and hoped you would talk to me,
even if it was just a few words,
asking my opinion or thanking me for
something good that happened in your life yesterday -
but I noticed you were to busy
trying to find the right outfit to put on
and wear to work.
I waited again.
When you ran around the house getting ready
I knew there would be a few minutes for you to stop and say hello,
but you were too busy.
At one point you had to wait fifteen minutes
with nothing to do except sit in a chair.
Then I saw you spring to your feet.
I thought you wanted to talk to me
but you ran to the phone and called a friend
to get the latest gossip.
I watched as you went to work
and I waited patiently all day long.
With all your activities
I guess you were too busy
to say anything to me.
I noticed that before lunch
you looked around,
maybe you felt embarrassed to talk to me,
that is why you didn't bow your head.
You glanced three or four tables over
and you noticed some of your friends
talking to me briefly before they ate, but you didn't.
That's okay. There is still more time left,
and I have hope that you will talk to me...
yet you went home
and it seems as if you had
lots of things to do.
After a few of them were done you turned on the TV,
I don't know if you like TV or not,
just about anything goes there
and you spent a lot of time each day
in front of it,
not thinking about anything -
just enjoying the show.
I waited patiently again
as you watched the TV and ate your meal...
but again you didn't talk to me.
Bedtime - I guess you felt too tired.
After you said goodnight to your family
you plopped into bed and fell asleep in no time.
That's okay
because you may not realize
that I am always there for you.
I've got patience
more than you will ever know.
I even want to teach you
how to be patient with others as well.
I love you so much
that I wait everyday for a nod,
prayer or thought or a thankful part of your heart.
It is hard to have a one-sided conversation.
Well you are getting up again and once again I will wait with nothing but love for you hoping that today you will give me some time.

Have a nice day!
Your friend,
GOD

One love.. Lets get together and feel alright.

Today is the day after I successfully completed first Rockford Event! but why the hell I am not happy?! For over a 3 months hard work and after burning all the mid night oil I have achieved a bit. Done from pin to plane all alone and celebrating success alone! may be that's why I am not greatly happy. Dad was always against my will to do business but to work in a company. All family members says they are with me, but how! just words or something more.I don't know. It was early morning When I was running for the event and called one of my very new friend who barely knows me and my life. I asked her to wish me luck for the event and she politely did. Felt Nice. Sent messages to friends to wish me luck.. got few replies. However when i sat on chat most on my net friends knew about the events and they all congratulated me and wished me. So now I am feeling that distant friends whom you never met are more interested in your affairs than the close ones.

Will not talk more..

ONE LOVE.. Lets Get together and feel alright.

Coffee Tonight?

Age:22 years, Time: 10:30pm, Place:Pune,India, Date: sep.2006
Its the story of Pooja Singh and me. Pooja Singh ahh.. the most beautiful VnA trainer I have ever seen, Short heighted, good looks, very soft spoken, excellent at her work. I joined a well known BPO and found this girl asking my name and hobbies in few interactions.Was good training session lasted for a week and here we are ready for the party!! Pooja asked me to pick her up from her place and I took time to get ready and in evening I cleaned my bike after a long time and straight went to pick her up. She was standing alone at the society gate and was eagerly waiting for me as we were getting late. As we drove to the venue she asked me if I go to parties regularly to which my obvious answer was No. We reached venue and I pulled her for dance, she enjoyed a lot had had good time. Its was time to home now. She was feeling bore after party and wanted to eat something and to my hard luck I dint find the single place open for dinner as it was almost 2:30am!! we both decided to go to Railway station for some quick snacks.. She has some kinda role and told me about her living alone problems..to which I just nodded my head. She finished her role and now ready to go to home. It was a silent night she was holding me while sitting at pillion. We reached her society, parked bike at the gate only, I walk her to the staircase. Told her about people talking about her n me in the office. she grinned and gave a pat on my cheeks. and asked "Would you like to have a coffee?" I glanced at the watch, it was 3:00am and I just replied "Its late, thanks for asking". She made and disappointed face and Said Goodnight and left the spot. For the rest of the night and while riding the bike I was trying to think about her this behaviour.

The next day when I went to office and told about this to a colleague that's she asked me for a coffee, he laughed a loud on me ans said my friend you lost the golden chance as you dint do chance pe dance. I still dint understand. He scolded me saying Idiot she was not asking for a coffee but something more on a coffee! HOLY COW!! how come I dint realize this yesterday night!! regrets? nah.. never mind.. at least I know the meaning of coffee now! ..

A Letter to My Father.

Dear Father,

How I wish to start with a "How are you doing". Its been almost 27 years when I can into existence. observing and absorbing inherited army life with early morning drills, army uniform, polished shoes, tough soldiers around and lots of discipline.

Born in a very small village and your strong will takes me to where I am today. I still cant forget the night at 8:30pm when I shown you my report card with my lowest marks ever even after you taught me for the previous whole night. I cant forget the night you hung me up side down for punishment and that is the reason why I am today standing handsome straight.

I know you are always away from emotional life and family but I also know you are the one always around for everything. may it be our values, may it be our needs, may it be our habits, may it be our demands. I am recalling the day when I flunk in college and you sent me to new city. I am recalling the day when I fallen for a girl and you got me new bike. I am recalling the day when you forced me to join MBA, I am recalling the day when you first kept quite infornt of police because of me, I am recalling the day when I put you down, I am after the day when you will hug me and say yes son you are the one.

I know your struggle from a brilliant village boy to achieving a A class gadgeted army officer. But Have I taken this for granted and done all the opposite things in life? or was it just the bad company I wan in? I cant recall if I have made you feel proud ever but always harass you.

But now I realise after you put me to pain and Now I am in gain. I may not become you in my this life coz father is a father and son is mere a son. please accept my hearty gratitude for forgiving me for everything. I am now a tough, strategic business mind as you always wanted. About to start a business and will be blessed if you just cut the ribben on the first day.

I have never done anything by which you we called "thats Neeraj's dad" but I am always happy to be known as your son.

It longs for your hug, runs across the living room to tug your legs the moment you return from work and dreams of growing up with you. It still lives with you in the same old apartment. And it’ll someday tell you how much I miss you. Miss you, Dad.

A new owner or a loser?

Seems to me that I’ve developed a habit of losing stuff and, as if a strange pun of destiny, get back what I lost. And that seems to be the pattern – at different times it was my mobile, jacket, a duffel bag, all finding their way back after being lost.

I set out to write a story
That spoke of a loser
And how he lost.

What is losing, after all
But the temporary misgivings
Of a trampled mind
Where thoughts trickle
Through
Sepia tinted pages
Of a depleted memory

What is losing, after all
But a mere
“Change of owner”
Like they say of Energy
Or the soul
That could only move
From one owner to another

I set out
Searching
For those phantom words
To tell his story
But the words elude me
Much like my fortune
As I keep looking
For my lost words.

What is losing, after all?
Words that just passed
Like the rainless clouds?
Or did the loser just find
A new owner
For the words he lost?

Chase your dream..

what dream!? money? girlfriend? car? job? business? what dream??!!! aahh thats a question.. or just live each day like a dog... ?? When you jelous or envy some one or somthing, dude you started dreaming for that! Starts planning, homework, meet people.. make note of small details and then feel passionate about the same. I have a dream of create most successful clubing brand! For 4 years now I am after the same. Worked for many many sectors and industries with no perks what so ever. Extreme social life..nothing personal, lost someone close, lost all money, lost faith, lost friends and much more... but more you lose the more you get is the attitude which keeps you going. but with whome you celebrate that success?? may be nobody!? nah... you have all new set of friends and loved ones now! work hard, harder and harder and slog your ass like anything, get jacked, become shabby and focused.. leave love, care and those big jargons and here you are its the time you should get some perks!

If you are passionate and have something to prove people will join you anytime with time, money or would just like to be friends. I have chased my dream and now I am almost achieving the same. ROCKFORD is what I dremat of.. and feel good when I see my place where its getting into shape, I feel good when I see official partner of huge business group, feel good to see projected figures, feel good in the company of new friends and like minded business tycoons, feel good for everything.. If someone like me can chase anyone can.

2am at pune station and watching trains passing by with a cool breeze with lots of noice and worried people and I am enjoying my tea. Feel good by thing this is the place where I landed first time in Pune and felt first step to success..

Goodnight or goodlife.. chase your life and dream you'l get to know!

Chat, the magic of meeting known!

It was good winters sunny day when I was enjoying my coffee at home comfort. Logged in to the famous music site and was listening to music. Was curious to click on the link for friends. and it I am ready with my own ID to make mew friends online. Made quick search and found few people online, greeted everybody and here I got the reply for the unknown. ID is not clear to tell if its a girl or a guy. To my surprise i got a question "Do you believe in ladies first?" I dint understand and said yes. Introduced myself and after couple of messages found its a good mid aged lady for whom is a first day to chat on this site. In a good 15 min chat I now know she like gardening, travelling and is quite aloof but try to be happy with her kids. The lady is interesting and funny at times. But if I am not wrong she is a pure homely lady who just wanted to be friend of someone unknown. She is cautions to share contact details after my good advice to her.

The reason to tell you all this is now I am thinking that people is not bad around its just the view how you look to people. You need to be positive about what you see and what you do. Meeting the unknown is not bad if you understand the person's inner self. Internet is bad is worse for those who miss use it for excellent for the people who know how to deal with this compliacted computer network. We say technology made people machine but I think technology made people closure and helped understand the way human behave and react. In couple of muints you dont understand the person however atleast you know that someone is there to listen your mood, whome you can share your feeling without the fear of reactions becuase you just havent seen them. Meeting a people personally affects the words you use to chat.

Well, you might me wondering what happened to that lady? Did I meet her again? The answers is no. I don't know hows she doing? was she stating correct about her. I don't know Will i chat with her again. I don't know what she feels. But I know that she will be good in what ever she does. All the best to her and her life. Keep chatting, keep wondering.. its a magic feel it. Dont react!